Eeech Love!

My greatest pain at the moment is that Papa and Mama find it difficult to accept that I cannot be with them at a moment's notice because of my service. They would text me to go visit them now and bring this item. Even go with them tomorrow. The difficult thing for me is that I do love them and Mama is just recovering from her surgery that a part of me really wishes to be there with them to help. But I also fully realize that the Lord has called me to the service that I'm doing. And in doing my service faithfully, He will bless my loved ones. Including, answering my prayer for Mama's healing.

Man, it's painful! If not for the fact that I love the Lord more than I love them, then I wouldn't know what to do. I am reminded of the little strip of paper I received last night. The Bible verse said, "If you suffer with Him, so you will reign with Him." Something like that. Don't ask me where it is in the Bible coz I returned the strip of paper. But that verse gave me consolation. Surely, the suffering that I endure is so little compared to the prize that awaits me: reign with Him, huh! Beat that, world!

So, even if I cried while talking to my facilitator this lunchtime, and my heart cries inside of me, I choose to smile a bit. I'm not really sure if I'm really succeeding but what the heck, I'm trying anyway :). As my dear favorite woman saint says: "Miss no single opportunity of making some small sacrifice, here by a smiling look, there by a kindly word; always doing the smallest thing right and doing it all for love" (St Therese of Lisieux). Eeech, if not for love, what's all this for?